Have you read the 5 Languages of Appreciation in the Workplace to help improve the culture of your workplace?
Why do I care?
In many studies it has been proven that a happy work place is more productive with lower staff turnover than an unhappy workplace.
A lot of people in lots of different settings (home, work, volunteer, friendships) do/gift things that they think the recipient will appreciate to say "Thank you!" When the recipient isn't 'thrilled' with what they received, it's often misunderstood by the gift giver. 'They're ungrateful', 'they're entitled', 'nothing is ever good enough'. Usually this isn't the case - it's because you're not 'speaking their love language'; you're speaking your own love language.
By taking the time to learn the recipients love language, when you want to say "Thank you!" it will go a long way if it's done in the language they love the most. Time invested is time well spent.
What are the 5 love languages?
Gary Chapman has written several books relating the same 5 love languages back to friendship, spouses and children. Paul White joins him to adapt this to relate to the workplace. The 5 love languages are:
Words of Affirmation
Quality Time
Acts of Service
Tangible Gifts
Physical Touch
You will find that your love language is the one you display/give the most. It's important that you are aware that it's not necessarily the same for everyone. Breaking the meaning of these 5 love languages down brings you awareness and creates valuable conversations to learn what is most appreciated by those you value.
Below is a summary of this book's contents - but I highly recommend sourcing your own copy. The links below allow you to access it physically, digitally or audibly.
Words of Affirmation
This is genuine words of praise. When you recognise something someone has done and compliment them. This could be in writing or verbally, one on one or in front of other people in a more public setting. If appropriate, this could even be on Social Media.
This is my primary language in a workplace setting. If you'd like to share any of your Words of Affirmation about the great services you've received from Super Accounting, I'd love you to leave a Google Review!
For example - a co-worker goes out of their way to assist you with your task to meet a deadline just before you go on holidays. After they have gone home for the night, you take the extra time to write them a quick note or email thanking them for going out of their way to assist you. If this is their love language, they will appreciate this more than a souvenir from your holiday (Tangible Gift).
Another example might be that you have accomplished the completion of a major job, or won a new job that will elevate the firm, and the boss recognises your efforts in the next team meeting. Mark Creedon also gives good examples of this in his Podcast: Mastermind for Business: Gratitude and Appreciation (link included below).
I have also seen how this is appropriate in a Social Media setting. For example, Councils consist of a large group of individuals that cover lots of different services. In Charters Towers they started using Facebook to announce their decision to start working with Employer Branding Australia to start publicly recognising their individual employees. One particular employee, Peter, was highlighted for his happy demeanor and the pride he takes in his work. Given his work as a street cleaner is viewed by all in the public eye, this recognition resulted in over 95 positive comments within the week from the community members also recognising his hard work. Imagine how Peter felt reading those?!
Quality Time
For others, you taking time out of your day to do something special with them is their preferred love language.
That employee that stayed late - take them to lunch when you get back to say thank you.
That employee that went out of their way to bring in that new job? Maybe you've got a seminar coming up that not everyone can go to and they would love the opportunity to go with you?
The team has hit a major milestone - put on morning tea and take the time to sit down with them and engage in what they're discussing.
Acts of Service
The employee that helped you complete your task so you could go on holidays? That was an act of service.
When the boss offers to get you a coffee because they can see you're swamped? That's an act of service.
It's going out of your way to do something to assist someone else in whatever way you see possible.
This is my love language at home - when the kids do their jobs and I don't have to ask!
Tangible Gifts
This is the most well understood act of appreciation - but it is not always well used.
Too frequently people give things to other people with no thought on what they like, focusing instead on the budget they have set and their perceived value of what the other person might like. Sometimes a tangible gift doesn't have to cost a cent.
For this love language to have meaning, you have to know what that person really appreciates. It could be:
a handmade card
muffins for morning tea
a gift voucher at their favourite store
dinner when they've worked back late
a bottle of Grey Goose (me), vodka cruisers (Kelly) or a carton of XXXX (Michelle).
If you are intending to give tangible gifts, make sure that you know what that other person is going to value before spending your hard earned money to say thank you - particularly if this isn't even their love language.
As an employer, this could be the gift of 'time off'. Recognising an employee by giving them an afternoon off to get their Christmas shopping done because you know they have 3 kids and limited time for such things might mean more to them than a voucher or an award that will collect dust on their desk.
Physical Touch
In a workplace, this is not always appropriate and the conversations around this usually result in aversion. But what it could be is a high five, a handshake or a consoling hug or touch on the shoulder when a colleague has endured a loss.
At home, this is definitely my kids preferred language, they love to be hugged and receive shoulder massages and back tickles.
Improve the culture of your workplace
Have you identified your love language yet? You may have more than one and they may be different depending on the setting (ie home vs work).
Do you know your colleagues love languages? Do you know your employees love language? It can make the workplace much more enjoyable to work in if you start the conversation and start speaking in their chosen love languages. We spend more time at work than home - this could make such a positive change!
What if you don't appreciate your team members?
The book actually identifies this! What if you have someone where you're not happy with the work they do?
First - do you have unrealistically high expectations? Are they actually capable of performing what you're asking them to do? If anything they ever do 'good enough'? If this answer is no, they suggest counselling. But, before you see a professional, ask a friend (one of those real friends that tell you the truth no matter how much it hurts) and ask if you're too critical first.
Sometimes your personalities will just clash - no matter what they do it "rubs you the wrong way" and irritates you. Not everyone is going to be the same as you - thank God! Diversity is what brings different opinions, unique ways of looking at things, innovation and improvement. If it's not complimenting your workplace, then it might be time for someone to move on.
Sometimes it's not understanding another persons role and judging their actions as inappropriate for their role. As Steven Covey says in "7 Habits of Highly Effective People"
Seek first to understand, then to be understood.
If it is performance - are their performance requirements clear to them? Is it because of something at home that's recently happened? Are they adequately trained? Have you tried talking to them with no changes? If there is really no reason for them not meeting performance requirements it might be time to start the dismissal process.
More information
Resources
To discuss any of the above further, you can ring Super Accounting on 07 4021 2801.
'Remember, change starts with you!'